A Message to Sarah Palin

And we're off..

School has officially begun which means that I have fifteen other things to do that take priority over blogging about it so here's a real quick update:

• I start my new job on September 5th.
• Jack just had his three month check-up and is 17.5 lbs.
• I'm taking twelve credit hours this semester and attempting to get some work done on my senior thesis.
• The two Germans boys I adopted (one's my I-pal, the other was a stray we found on campus) are readily adjusting to Lincoln. Lately my spare time has consisted of helping them read aerosol deodorant labels so they actually buy deodorant and not just body spray.
  

Well, that's all I can think of at the moment... you'll know more when I do.

Cupcake

Oh yes, and I got a new car a few weeks ago... her name is Cupcake.

Kylee, my six-year-old niece, helped me pick it out. It's cute, it's little, and twelve years newer than my last car.

I <3 Cupcake.

A new year begins...

... academically speaking this coming Monday.

This is, if all goes according to plan, my last year at Wesleyan and I'm currently in the process of trying to make some huge, potentially life altering decisions. It's not fun. It's kind of exciting, but mainly, it's terrifying.

In other news.... my I-Pal got here yesterday. His name is Marcel Wolke and he's from Dortmund Germany. We met while I was still there and he's at Wesleyan for the fall semester. My job is to show him around Lincoln and Wesleyan, help him get through classes and general abroad adjustments that he'll need to make. Yesterday and today we got a lot accomplished... cell phone, dorm room, groceries, housing contract, visa stuff, and a bunch of other administrative type things. In addition to Marcel I've temporarily adopted another German exchange student (his I-pal was away last week and unable to join us today) named Julian. Basically I'm doing my best to ensure that their transition to Wesleyan and the necessary paperwork that accompanies it all is easier than mine was to Dortmund.

I'll write again soon!

(I'm hoping it'll be a bit easier now that I'll be getting on an actual schedule again.)

Jack

Jack is the new puppy.

He's a 9 week old Weimaraner with a silver coat and blue eyes. His likes are pooping, eating, tennis balls, things that squeak, napping on me or with my favorite blanket, and attacking house plants and door springs (you know, those things that go "bong" that keep the door/doorknob from putting a hole in the wall behind it). His dislikes include kennel time, being told no, and stairs.

Pictures are coming soon.

I'm home!

... and I'm exhausted. Still.

Instead of jet lag I just got kinda sick. The A's (asthma and allergies) again so I'm drinking alka seltzer like it's going out of style. Anyway... I am home... I still have the same cell phone number and e-mail so give me a call if you're in Lincoln or simply if you feel like chatting. I'm not doing any paid work right now (i.e. I'm unemployed) but I am working. I have a lot of paperwork/administrative things that I have to do before school starts up again. In addition I'm looking at grad schools and options I may or may not have after graduation and trying to get my transcripts from Germany... which would expedite half of what I have to do.

Again... (or perhaps for the first time if I haven't seen you yet) I'm glad to be home.

T - 24 hours

Soon enough I'll be on a plane...

... and this time it'll be a plane home. Crazy, huh?

Just a few tidbits...

• I come home in less than a week thereby proving Josh wrong. (He made some offhand comment to mom about the fact that I'd bought a one-way ticket and following it with , "You remember what happened to Uncle Bruce?"... I guess "Uncle Bruce?" took a trip to Europe to "look around" and came home 25 years later. Sounds like a cool guy.)
  
• I will have spent 329 days in Germany (or at least out of the U.S.)
  
• I've decided to keep my blog. I don't know how many of my close friends and family members actually read this, but what I do know is that without the blog Aunt Julie could not live through me vicariously. I don't want to take that away from her.
  
• Another reason I'd decided to keep updating this thing is because I'm seriously considering graduate school. The downside is that there really aren't any programs that interest me in the U.S. central time zone. Which is my ultra-nice way of saying TOO MUCH CORN! Kidding! You can never have enough corn... or cows... or tractors, silos, grain bins, barbed wire, men in overhauls, trucks with gun racks, or politically incorrect mascot names (Go Indians! I mean, Miners! Seriously people?). Anyway, I love the Midwest and it will always be "home"... but it probably won't always coincide with my address.
  

You should read this...

Here's another article about the "Rabbit Ripper"...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1033701/Rabbit-ripper-Ruhr-leaves-German-detectives-baffled-spate-beheaded-pet-bunnies.html

Speaking of bunnies...

... here's a picture of mine.

Crunch Time

It's past midnight here, making it Monday, meaning that I have exactly a week left before I start the trek home. I was trying to make a list of all the things I have to do (administratively speaking) before I go... and it's overwhelming. For the last few years I've had to move immediately after finals were over, but this is the first time that I'll be moving to a different continent immediately after.

___________________

I've been here for close to a year now and am happy to report that I continue to learn new things. Yesterday I heard German rap for the first time. With lyrics like, "bring den Tune zuruck" and "spiel den Shit nochmal" I must say it's pretty similar to American rap... just goofier because it's sprinkled with English words. I also learned the word for goblet this morning (which is every bit as useful as hearing German rap... oh well).

Changing subjects...

• Tammy and baked cookies today and then fed them to birds. You know, helping the hungry.
• One of my houseplants blew out of my window and into my apartment (my fluffy three that's a bout four feet tall) about two weeks ago. It's pot broke and my solution was just to sit it in another pot. So far I haven't replaced any of the dirt but I continue to water it... which of course just washes away whatever dirt was left sticking to the roots. Surprisingly, the thing's never looked better.
• There's a 2,500 Euro reward for anyone with information leading to the arrest of the "Rabbit Ripper." For the last year someone in my area has been killing pet rabbits in Dortmund and Witten by decapitation. Apparently this individual is also draining all of the blood from the rabbit taking it with them... at least they're not finding it at the scene. Check it out (the article, not the headless bunnies)... ( http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7494184.stm ) The article states 30, but I read forty from another source..

So I'm packing...

It's 3:35 a.m. right now and I'm packing. Here's what I've decided...

I want to become a minimalist.

I went to the post office to weigh one of my suitcases today and was shocked to find out that it was 59 pounds... which believe it or not is 11 pounds lighter than it was when I originally packed it a year ago (I've been throwing shoes away). My second suitcase (which I've just packed) is lighter than first (which is encouraging)... unfortunately I keep finding shoes.

See you all soon

Error

I was going to upload some pictures... but apparently blogspot's not allowing that today.

Is Iowa the new New Orleans?

What happened in New Orleans a few years ago is terribly unfortunate; lives were figuratively and literally lost, and if my blog were popular at the "general public" level I'm sure I'd get a lot of hate mail regarding the title of this entry. But rest easy, I'm not making fun of the situation in New Orleans or in Iowa... I'm making fun of religious zealots... because who doesn't love a good bible-beater-beating? (Considering my audience I'll probably get more hate mail from that lovely little tidbit of alliteration more than anything else... but carrying on...)

I was pondering aloud this past weekend with a friend of mine here who's actually from Iowa. In fact, there are three University of Iowa students in Dortmund at present (Tammy, Laila, and Lissy). Anyway, my thought was this: "I wonder how long it will be until some religious group or televangelist comes forward and describes Iowa as another 'Sodom and Gomorrah' that needed to be 'wiped clean' and 'saved through the grace of the Lord'?"

Basically I'm waiting for a conservative nut-job to fall from his or her fundamentalist tree and smack their little shell on the pavement below, emptying their nutty contents for all the passing world to see. The only reason I bring this up is because I find it helpful to vent my dissatisfaction to friends and family... and because I find this sort of "religious reckoning" absolutely appalling. Although I've never been a fan of the popular, "If he brings you to it, he'll get you through it," Christian key chain mantra, labeling natural events and disasters that are for the most part the result of simple, albeit destructive, weather patterns as "acts of God" meant to, "punish the sinner," for, "their evil wickedness and immoral actions" feels a little extreme. So it's legal to gamble in Iowa... is that really reason to flood and destroy more than 400 city blocks? Even thought I'm by no means a proponent of gambling, I still say no.

Of course I'm in Germany and I really have no idea if any cashews or pecans have come forth yet. In fact, I hope my preemptive-rant (I'm calling it a preemptive-rant at this point because I don't know if it has happened, or even if it will happen) is completely uncalled for in the case of Iowa. On the other hand I would like to note that the people responsible for the religious propaganda and condemnation that surrounded the hurricane that effected New Orleans will, by mandate of their own beliefs, burn in hell for all eternity. Why? Because true Christians know that God is the only arbiter come judgment day and that trying to assume the position or duties of the Lord is a more than sizable offense. (Which in turn makes me a hypocrite since I'm judging those who judged, but then again, I don't claim to be a "true" anything.)

Phew... well I feel better.

And in all reality I should. In fact, I shouldn't even be worrying about what Reverend Tithe, Pastor Eve L. Sinner , or Father Call-Our-800-Number-Now could potentially propagandize Iowa for since gay marriage was recently made legal in California.

I'm sure they're all busy fund-raising for a cure for gay.

More about snails...

Another class... last week... talking about snails... here's the convo...

This took place in German, but for your convenience and mine... it's now in English.

Dr. Martin: It used to be possible to make a very broad doctoral thesis, but now, everything is very specialized since everything has already been covered in the broader sense. Now we have theses over things like... I don't know... "Why can't snails fly?"
Tijmen the Dutch Guy: What's a 'Schnecke?' (Snail)
Andrea: (Drawing a picture of a snail on her notebook) This is a snail.
Tijmen the Dutch Guy: Ooooooh. (continues playing racing games on his cell phone)
Dr. Martin: Snails like beer.
All students: Ooooook. (nod heads)
Dr. Martin: If you put out some beer in your backyard, all the nearby snails will come and gather around the beer.
Andrea: I thought that only worked with men?

Another funny/interesting conversation I had recently... not about snails... but beer...

The scene: two eight year old boys drawing pictures when I overhear them talking about Krombacher and Veltins (two beer brands).

Andrea: Krombacher? What?
Little Boy: It's delicious.
Andrea: And how old are you?
Little Boy: Eight.
(I stand there in my usual "I'm-too-shocked-to-say-anything" stance because I'm pretty sure he's serious.)
Little Boy: Yep, I drink the whole beer. It's good stuff.
Other Little Boy: I like Veltins better.

It should be noted that both little boys were drawing pictures of crates of beer. This was for a project I did for a literature class on how children interpret literature... it wasn't really what I expected... but I guess that's the point of doing research.

"At times I make up words." - Mary Daly, radical feminist and my personal hero

I generally don't make up too many words, but I do confuse them quite frequently. Most people will tell you that this is quite common, especially when learning a "sister" language like German. Today was an excellent example.

When talking about geographic minorities, in comparison to ethnic minorities, in Germany someone brought up Zigeuner, gypsies, as a geographic minority and Dr. Martin said something along the lines of:

"Es gibt nicht eine Menge Zigeuner in Deutschland, also versuchen wir, sie zu schützen."

Excuse any errors I may have made there (not that many of my readers speak German, but still). Anyway, basically he said, "There aren't that many gypsies in Germany and we [the German people] want to protect them."

QUICK GERMAN LESSON (and something necessary to understanding the comedy of this situation):

• Cognates are words that are similar in both languages.
• Example: Kultur, Baby, Bier, Karotte und Auto (respectively: culture, baby, beer, carrot, and car. It should also be noted that I'm not really sure if car is considered a cognate or not, but just the same, it's one of those words that if you know English you can probably figure out what "auto" means in German).
• The verb to protect is schützen in German.
• Schützen is phonetically similar to saying "Shoots-sen".
• Go ahead, try to say "Shoots-sen"... it sounds like it looks... shoot, right?

Yes. I am. Moving on now...

When Dr. Martin said, "Es gibt nicht eine Menge Zigeuner in Deutschland, also versuchen wir, sie zu schützen," or "There aren't that many gypsies in Germany and we [the German people] want to protect them," I mistook the verb schützen for a cognate and personally translated it as:

There aren't that many gypsies in Germany and and we [the German people] want to shoot them.

Obviously, I was incorrect. Luckily for me this was by no means the worst mistake I've made when learning the German language. It's the third.

Runner-up dates back to last semester, the morning after the shooting that occurred in Westroads Mall in Omaha, during a Konversation course when we were talking about current events in our home areas. (It's now that I should quickly note that foreigners, more specifically Europeans, seem to have a odd fascination/highly enjoy talking about or criticizing the United States and it's history of school/public shootings. In addition, a school shooting attempt had been recently foiled in Köln, which is near Dortmund and in the coming weeks, Finland would experience it's first school shooting in like twenty years, not to mention it's most deadly). That being said, I was trying to explain what had happened, and not knowing the verb for "shooting", quickly looked it up in my handy-dandy electronic dictionary. The verb was "Schießen"... pronounced phonetically as, "She's-Zen," because in German the second vowel (in this case is the 'e' highlighted in green) is pronounced, rather than the 'i' like it would be in English. Anyway, I was trying to tell them that there was a large shooting in Omaha, Nebraka but instead I pronounced the 'i' instead of the 'e' which changed my verb from shooting to shitting and ultimately changed my sentence into, "There was a large shitting in Omaha, Nebraska." People laughed, I was embarrassed.... end of story.

The Grand Champion of language goof ups goes to the same verb. This happened at the beginning of this semester (early April) during a Literature, Culture, and Language course. We were reading William Tell aloud in class when I was asked to read. More specifically, I was asked to read the part where Mr. Tell shoots the apple off his sons head. I made the exact same mistake I'd made before and said that, "He shit the apple off his head," instead of shooting it off his head.

Well here they are, my top three language goof-ups. If you're not satisfied, have no fear, tomorrows another day and inevitably another dozen or so chances for me to butcher the German language.

Snail Week

I'm thinking about getting my TEFL certification (teaching English as a foreign language). I have the experience, but now I'd have the credentials as well which would actually "mean something" in the eyes of society (i.e. various applications). That, and I really enjoy it. The basic class certification starts at $325 (60 hour class) and goes up to $470 (120 hour class). In all truth, I'd like to get the full 120-hour certification since it'd be more complete (not to mention more useful),... but I think that will all depend on funds.

Mom, Scott, and Neila came home from Florida today. I called when they got home only to be cut short by the arrival of the grandkids. If only I were cute, little, and still in preschool... or maybe I could just run around with my mouth open trying to bite one of my siblings (because they do an awful lot of that, too).

It was "Snail Week" at Ostenberg Grundshule this week. I arrived on Monday morning only to find all of the kids running around outside looking for snails and picking grass (Germany has monstrous snails... at least way bigger than anything I ever captured as a kid). Later, after the habitats had been set up, we read from their science book about Schneckekinder (snail babies)... i.e. where baby snails come from. It was then that I realized how much of a prude I am (perhaps the correct term is actually 'puritanical American'). In the biology book, there was a picture of two snails mid-coitus. Of course they're snails - which are roughly 0.0127 points above being asexual - but this was a book for six and seven year olds... and in my "advanced age" I was thought to myself, "When I was your age, we didn't talk about sex in school! And when we did it was purely speculation!" (Thank you public schools for denying your students sex ed. and thank you Christian schools for denying sex entirely [note the sarcasm])
Anyway, this was a fleeting moment of conservative "Oh my!" until I turned the pages to a future chapter with a two page spread titled: "Mädchen oder Junge?" (Girl or Boy?) They were cartoons... but the first page pictured a back view of two naked and rather androgynous children. The text said something about not being able to tell the difference from the back whereas the next page had a front view of both anatomically correct children. In addition, just in case you failed to notice, there were oh-so-conveniently pointing arrows to, you guessed it, a penis and a vagina. I nearly fell off my chair.
The worst part of this whole experience is not that there was animated nudity in these books, it was that I was disappointed in myself for being so shocked by these pictures. You see I realized that I truly am a product of the United States school system, and not that that's completely failed me yet, but obviously the 'nudity-phobe' culture from which I emerged has had a lasting effect. In addition, I felt completely unworthy of calling myself liberal.

On a final note, I've almost completed the hour requirement for my internship. (This is good news.)

Hopefully within coming weeks I'll have something a bit more interesting to write about than snail sex... but just so you don't leave without learning anything... snails lay sixty eggs at a time. Spread the word.

56

• Olfactory receptors, in humans, are categorized in 56 families.
• The word "Yeah" is sung 56 times in both R.E.M.'s song "Man on the Moon" and Nirvana's, "Lithium".
• Fifty-six is also the number of consecutive games where Joe DiMaggio had a base hit in 1941.
• Fifty-six also represents the number of men who signed the United States Declaration of Independence.
  
• It is also the code for international direct dial phone calls to Chile.
• Fifty-six is atomic number for barium.
• And... fifty-six is the number of days in which I'll be back in the U.S.

Spiderman 3

I finally watched Spiderman 3 today. So let me say just one thing...

You suck Topher Grace.

Topher should have just stayed that skinny stoned white-kid sitting on the couch in his parent's basement on "That 70's Show" because that's basically who he plays in the movie... except whinier and more pathetic (I know! I know! I had no idea that was possible either!).

I am the little dog...

... and Germany is the big dog.

Nothing's Happening

I'm doing a lot of studying... and the bunnies who live outside my apartment just had another litter. That's about it.

What are you guys up to?

14 Olives for the Low Price of $4.66

That's right, I'm blogging about olives... my life is just that exciting right now.

Tom and I went to the "nice" grocery store down today and the guy who was guarding the "free" samples all but literally twisted my arm into buying some olives. I bought some sort of large variety (about the size of small plastic Easter egg) that were coated in fresh herbs and garlic and stuffed with almonds. They're delicious. As a "gift" he also allowed me to eat one of the shrimp and gave me a smaller container with about twelve regular sized olives that are spiced (with chili's) and stuffed with the most scrumptious chili gelatin I've ever had.

What I'm saying is that I payed nearly five dollars American for olives. For beautiful, ripe, firm green olives and I actually feel that it was worth it. For those of you who don't remember, this is quit a change for me, the girl who used to eat canned black olives after wearing them on the tips of her fingers... of course I was five, it was thanksgiving, and you all weren't watching the "kids table" very carefully...

Thomas Weisskopf

Tom was an exchange student at Elmwood-Murdock Jr./Sr. high school when I was a freshman in high school at Weeping Water. His host family was pretty involved in one of the Weeping Water churches though and that's how we go to know each other.

On to the point... I haven't seen Tom in six years (we've talked on and off though) but he's coming to visit for the weekend. Also, in a crazy, twisted, it's-a-small-world-after-all sorta way there's another American girl studying in Dortmund this semester who studied in Tom's hometown when she was in high school.

Gustav Klimt, "The Kiss"

I have a poster of Klimt's "The Kiss" hanging in my room... the wrong way. Instead of hanging it vertically, I've hung it horizontally. It's been hanging wrong (no matter where I lived) for as long as I've had the poster (I think I got it in November). Some people notice, some people don't. I generally tell everyone that I've seen it displayed in various stores/places both ways... mainly to see what they say. A friend of mine called it a "bold choice" and later she told me that she liked that I hung it horizontally. I'm waiting, somewhat anxiously, for someone to come over and tell me what an idiot I am, to criticize my education, and mock me openly in my own apartment.

This is the intended view:

I realize I'm offending art students and Klimt admirers everywhere... but it fills the space on my wall and I rather like it "wrong"...


I've found hanging it this way can be a real conversation starter. I've also found that people who take the interpretation of art too seriously tend to ignore what's truly aesthetic about a piece; color, texture, complex lines, etc. (of course this is just my opinion). To clarify, I don't think that what is in the picture and how it's seen from a certain angle should determine the sum total of it's value. In fact, I feel that since Klimt's "The Kiss" can be hung incorrectly yet still maintain "sense" in one's mind only adds to it's beauty. Not that I think art necessarily needs to make sense... in fact, the only thing art really needs to do is appeal to someone.

It's because of this I'm seriously considering hanging the ten Van Gogh posters I have taped up around the place either upside down or sideways....

... just kidding.

And one more thing...

I just referred to an earlier post that promised extensions on the following subjects:

• My trip to Nijmegen √ check
  
• The New Place √ check
  
• Das Große Kinder Lexikon
• The Death of my Trees
• New Arrivals
  
• Why Germans don't make Friends Easily and
• The Ridiculousness that is Currywurst

To tie up the loose ends:

Das Große Kinder Lexikon is a book that I recently purchased. It's an encyclopedia geared towards the 8-14 crowd. I bought it in hope of improving my German reading level (to that of an eight-year-old). I also bought it to learn more about Germany, thinking that the articles titled "Hauptstadt" (Capital) and "Denkmal" (Monument) would have interesting things pertaining to the country in which I'm studying... instead, I got an article about Washington D.C. and Mount Rushmore.

One of my Australian Chestnut trees died in the move... both of my pine trees died... and my English Ivy looks like it was ran over. My cactus and two remaining Chestnut trees are doing just fine though. (I realize this is all terribly boring... but you have to keep in mind that I've been jobless and school-less for the last two months... something that hasn't happened since I was five. I hardly know what to do with myself.)

As far as new arrivals go I'm of course referring to the new exchange students, many of which I've met. Another Iowan joins us while I remain the sole Nebraskan. Five more students from New York are here along with another student from Ohio. There also seem to be several students from Italy and Spain, a few from Hungary, a Finn, a Brazilian, a Swede, two Ottomans, and a girl from Mexico. I'm sure I'm missing a great deal of the group in my list, such as the girl from ? whose name no one seems to be able to agree on.

Under the heading, "Why Germans don't make friends easily," one need only to come to Germany to understand that statement. I think I was particularly frustrated with the culture at the time, but just so we're clear, I'll provide with the following example:
A few weeks ago I went to meet a friend of mine at a cafe/coffee shop that can only be described as "the norm." I came in, sat down, opened the menu, made a decision, and proceeded to flag down the waiter who was all but a table away and slightly staring. When I attempted to give him my order he instructed me to go to the counter and order there. (It's now the appropriate time to note that I'd been to this cafe at least four times previously, and although I've become quite accustomed to the poor customer service in Europe, knew damn well that waiters still took food orders.) Just the same, I went the counter and ordered from the barista who very matter of factly told me to go sit down and order from the waiter. Shortly after Laila arrived and I explained what had just happened. She then approached the counter and received nearly the same treatment. The only difference being that the barista first laughed at her before telling Laila to go sit down.
On a side cultural note, Germans are also horrible Que'ers. They couldn't form a line if paid to do so. A trip to the bakery or the grocery store should be viewed as an event where elbow pads are not only suggested, but necessary. I've seen respectable looking women cut in front of and nudge each other for the chance to order their chosen loaf or pastry before the other.
Ok... I'm done ranting...

Ahhh... finally, the ridiculousness that is currywurst. This is again more of a cultural comment, but an amusing one rather than a critical one. For those of you who've traveled to Germany, you know that currywurst stands are every bit as common as Starbucks and McDonalds. You then also know what currywurst is and have been equally as unimpressed as I and many others have been. Most Germans (and I've been told Berliners in particular) will tell you that currywurst is the best food ever invented and, "was created right here in (insert wherever it is the German who's telling you this is from)".
So what is currywurst then? Cut up chunks of hot dog drowned in ketchup with curry powder mixed in eaten on a tissue thin plate with an impossibly small platic fork which admittedly is at least half of the "currywurst experience." That's right, the food you ate when you were five is such a national treasure here that there's dispute as to who invented it, where and how.
*You can't see me right now, but I'm rolling my eyes.

Post About Posts

As I'm sure you've noticed, my blog has went from hopelessly stagnant to completely over active in the last twenty-four hours. That being said I encourage you to review the last few posts so as not to miss any of the pictures I used precious internet uploading.

New Posts:

• Nijmegen: The Oldest Town in the Netherlands
• My New Place
• "First day of school! First day of school!" exclaimed Nemo.
• Palma, Mallorca (Spain)

Nijmegen: The Oldest Town in the Netherlands

As I promised in an earlier post, here are some pictures of Nijmegen. Nijmegen is an extremely quaint little city about (excuse the haughty, wanna-be high school writer, emo kid description) three and a half hours away from the bleak urban gray that is Dortmund.

(For some reason, using the words "bleak" and "gray" in such close proximity, for me personally, seems as though the writer is not only "trying too hard," but failing entirely at a creative description... i.e. it's too generic. Unfortunately, bleak and gray are the only ways in which someone can presently describe Dortmund, Germany; the only city I've ever seen actively fail changing seasons.)

For what I'm sure is unnecessary clarification: I should have studied here (see below):










And last, but not least, is my friend Laila pointing to what appeared to be dried blood on the seat next to her on the "boarder train" that goes from Germany to the Netherlands.

Yes, eww is right.

My New Place

Here's a brief tour of my new apartment:


My day bed:

My fleece -blankie "upholstered" hand me down couch:
Desk/Shelf/Work Station/"Media" Center:
Closet and kitchen entrance:
Stove and sink with a pot of spinach, tomato, mushroom, and onion crepe filing:
Kitchen counter and coat-rack:
Restroom:
Shower:

These are pictures taken from one of my windows... the weather was truly Nebraskan (i.e. indecisive) for a few days...

In the morning....
Two hours later...
Later still...

"First Day of School! First Day of School!" exclaimed Nemo.

Tomorrow's the first day of summer semester. Here's what I'm taking:

*Leseverstehen
*Studierende der Geisteswissenschaftlichen
*Landeskunde - Politik und Gesellschaft
*Literature, Kultur, und Sprache
*Kinder - und Jundendliteratur: Lesen & Verstehen
*Kreativs Schreiben
*Translation
*Wissenschaftliche Kommunikation (fächerübergreifend)

I'm also going to be teaching again, this time in an elementary school, for credits towards my German senior internship.

Palma, Mallorca (Spain)

Mallorca is a little island off the coast of Spain, belonging to Spain, only completely "Germanized."

Avery and I recently went there for a week.

Here are some pictures...

I moved!

... and find myself yet again without internet.

Coming soon...

• My trip to Nijmegen
  
• The New Place
• Das Große Kinder Lexikon
• The Death of my Trees
• New Arrivals
  
• Why Germans don't make Friends Easily and
• The Ridiculousness that is Currywurst

I'm moving!

This morning I received an e-mail saying that as of March 1st I'll be able to move into a single apartment on campus. The location is better and it's not too far from where I'm living now so the move shouldn't be too horrible. It's even within walking distance of the school I'm thinking about teaching at for my internship during the spring semester (which doesn't start until April).

Avery (Sunday and Departure Information)

Today was beautiful.

Despite the fact that it was Sunday we still had a rather eventful day. We went out to eat and on Avery's insistence arrived a little over an hour and a half BEFORE the restaurant opened. In other words... we walked around for a good while, but like I said, today was a beautiful.

On an even less exciting note, Avery leaves Dortmund tomorrow at 8:37 via ICE to Frankfurt where his flight will leave.

Avery (This Weekend)

Friday, February 15th:
Today we ran various errands for people at home - loved ones, co-workers, etcetera - in Dortmund.

Saturday, February 16th:
Originally we were going to venture out of the country today but since Avery's still sleeping and it's nearly eleven... I think we'll probably go somewhere a little closer... but we'll let you know.

Avery (Whereabouts and Actions Update)

Monday, February 11th:
Avery and I went to Bonn, the former capitol of West Germany, for the day. Bonn is also home to the birthplace of Beethoven and the Brauhaus Bönnsch (for details please refer to : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/B%C3%B6nnsch_%28beer%29 ) where we had dinner. Later in the evening we ventured to the Bad Godesberg portion of Bonn and went to the Godesberg Ruins (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Godesburg_2_db.jpg). We also visited this church: (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Bonn_Muenster.jpg) and rode past this building: (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Posttower_Bonn_001.jpg) which is the German postal center. On more time... we went to Bonn and saw things (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/24/General_view_over_bonn.jpg).

Tuesday, February 12th:
Dortmund City Center

Wednesday, February 13th:
We went out to lunch and it was a disaster. Avery was given an English menu (which is sometimes translated oddly) and ordered what he thought was a piece of fried fish on bread with a side order of onion rings. What came out was a very pungent whole fish (from a can) on a piece of black bread with raw onion "rings" on top.

Thursday, February 14th:
Avery and I went to Westfallenpark today in search of some stump that his boss has a picture of on her desk. We didn't find it... but we did take pictures with wooden hippos and enter into a brawl with some local geese. Avery also took a picture "meditating" which I can't wait photo shop and turn into a Christmas card.

Friday, February 15th:
TBA...

Avery

Avery's here from the 8th to the 18th.

Friday: Avery's train arrived SEVEN HOURS after it was supposed to due to A) Flight changes and B) the competence level of the Deutsche Bahn

Yesterday we went to Köln (Cologne) for the day.

Today is Sunday. Nothing happens on Sunday. Ave' may lose it... he said something about being used to forty decibels of sound and then started swearing about some sort of strawberry cereal dust... I think all the cereal's getting to him.

Tomorrow is currently TBA, but I'm guessing we'll go somewhere.

Fried Green Tomatoes

I've never seen that movie... but here's what's going on in Dortmund:

• Finals are next week (February 4th - 8th). I'm less than excited.
  
• I'm not particularly keen on the idea of doing my internship at the school I'm currently teaching for, so I may be making a switch to another school if at all possible.
  
• Avery will be here on the 8th.
• I think I want to learn to ski.
• I miss root beer.
  
• Basket's birthday is coming up, she'll be seven(teen) and apparently she looks older than I do the majority of the time. Right now I could care less, but when we're in our forties... (you can't see me right now but I'm making a thumbs up).
  
• I'm currently attempting to write a short story in German... it's about a platypus and his ugly duck friend... I'll let you know how it turns out.
  
• "My" German language skills continue to be a grammatical train wreck whenever I attempt to speak. The sound I believe is equivalent to nails on a chalk board. My vocabulary is slowly growing. Last week I learned the word for platypus (das Schnabeltier)... something I feel is essential... as well as der Kalkstein (Limestone), Wasser führende Schicht (Aquifer), and zwittrig (Androgynous).
• It's currently raining.
  

Toilet Paper Strike: Day 38

As a policy, I always try see the best in people... and in the case of my roommates, there's not a whole lot to see.

So far:

• Fish has been left on the counter multiple times for 2-3 days at a time
• Nearly every pan has at one point had something grow in it
• When they're not leaving random dinner rolls in the oven or on the counter (generally for a few days at a time) they're leaving meat in there. Apparently no one told them that oven's don't work the same way refrigerators do when it comes to keeping cooked meat safely edible.
  
• I've found tampon wrappers IN the shower...
• Next to two disposable razors full of pubic hair (the tampon wrapper was left in the soap dish for three days, the razors for over a week).
• One roommate insists upon cleaning her muddy shoes with the kitchen hand towel... only so she can hang the towel back on the rack.
• And the list goes on...

All in all... when they're not pissing me off by being utterly disgusting... they're just flat out pissing me off. To make a long, complicated, bilingual story short... we've been on a toilet paper strike for thirty-eight days (by my rough estimate). It started about a week before I went on vacation (which was two weeks) and since then... it's been a BYOTP affair. I know this because I often times forget a roll in there only to have it wipe the asses of the very people who are shitting on me.

I know what you're thinking though... "Well who's supposed to get the toilet paper?"
- Toilet paper, paper towels, baking paper, aluminum foil, trash bags, sponges, dish soap, and other cleaning supplies are supposed to be paid for from the "fund" (i.e. the blue plastic Tupperware thing that sits next to the spice rack). The idea is that every month each of us is supposed to put in 5 Euro ($7.36) to keep supplies at a satisfactory level. >>Fast Forward>> I quit putting money in there because no one else was, we were always out of things, and what's the point of putting money in a jar that I'll have to take out three minutes later to buy X house supply with?

Moving on... or rather back....

Last night, Julia - who thinks she's my mother (which is ridiculous because I like my mom) - physically kept me from leaving the apartment and taking out the trash. It was then that I decided I was though. Final straw. Game over. Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars. I'm either moving out... or I'm going to start listening to rock music.... really, really LOUD rock music... which I'm sure is against "Mother Julia's" rules.

"Mother Julia's" *KNOWN* Rules:

• No more than one friend over at a time on a school night, for no longer than one hour and no later than 7:30 p.m.
  
• I should also ask permission for the previous stated situation...
  
• On weekends I'm allowed to have two (count'um, TWO) friends over as long as:
• it's ok with the other roommates
• they aren't planning on having anyone else over
• and if my friends (all two of them) leave by 10 p.m.
  
• All doors will be closed according to the weekly demonstration given by "Mother Julia" (thus far she's shown every person in our apartment the proper way to shut a door... what she doesn't realize is that AFTER she gives said demonstration we all slam the doors on purpose).
• ALWAYS wear house shoes. Abide can cook in her underwear... but damn it I MUST wear shoes. (I didn't do this one time and they physically put shoes on me.)
  

There are a few other rules too but they're a little foggier... something like "thou shalt not shower more than once a week" and "thou shalt only refrigerate uncovered stinky foods that you intend to spill inside the fridge"... but I think they apply more to her.

Why I love children...

I was on the subway this afternoon when two small boys (about six or seven) sat down in front of me. Their conversation was fairly normal for small boys... looking out the window, pointing to the Fußball stadium, etc. until one of the boys started saying, "Scheiße" every other word (Scheiße = shit). "Scheiße this," and, "Scheiße that," he said. Apparently, in the world of a seven-year-old, "Alles Scheiße." Anyway, his friend didn't seem to agree because halfway through his rant his friend looked at him and said, "Du redest zuviel" (You talk too much).

My Trip: Has Been Blogged!

(See index to navigate to earlier destinations in the trip as the pictures take up quite a bit of room... just so no one (mom) misses anything.)

UPDATE: Has finally been blogged about...

Dresden, Germany

Originally we were going to stay in Dresden for two or three days depending on how we felt. As it turns out, we only felt like staying there for the afternoon.



It was a long trip that ended with this: ^

The ass of a Ford Fiesta with a very "states-like" plate (NYC) and a ridiculous window sticker.

Prague, Czech Republic

This is Prague.

Prague is very pretty.


This is me in Prague.


This is a strip club I accidentally visited. It was one of the more uncomfortable moments of my life. (Good mothers everywhere are gasping...)


This is a "Good Mother" (vodka, amaretto, and a straw).


And this is our bar tab... (in CZK... don't panic).


Me - dancing unattractively - but having a darn good time.


Okan and I (No, I'm not sniffing him...).


This is a homeless man in Prague who got drunk and passed out in the middle the "war zone" and woke up when some people nearly set him on fire via firework. Apparently in Prague they don't shoot the fireworks into the air as much as they shoot them into crowds of people.
(New Years in Prague is amazing... and absolutely CRAZY!)


This is an unattractive squinting picture of me by a boat.

This the statue outside of the hostel we stayed in. I liked it, so I took a picture.


And this is me being lazy and not really writing anything at all about the most amazing city I've ever been to.

Vienna, Austria

Ohhhhh Vienna...
Where the weather's frigid cold, internet cafes are cheap, and beer is ordered by the meter...


I'm gunna be honest... not a lot was accomplished in Vienna. We saw some things... castle-blah-blah-covered-in-ice and church-of-I-can't-feel-my-aaah-face... you know, general stuff. I did however purchase a new coat and my first pair of "sock-pants"... both of which were essential in surviving Vienna.